Friday, October 18, 2013

the one where I realize I'm aging

My ten year high school reunion was last weekend. I wasn't too panicked about it; I mean, I didn't try to impress my classmates while I was in high school, so why would I try to do that now? But while we were making small talk waiting for the football game to start, all of these little kids were walking around.

And then I realized that they were high school students and OH MY GOD, ONE CALLED ME MA'AM.

I've apparently always had an issue with aging. On my 20th birthday, I met up with some of my childhood friends to celebrate. They asked me if I planned on "going through with it", and I just stared at them blankly, clueless. They reminded me how I had promised that I ever made it to 20 that I was just going to off myself because that was ANCIENT.

When asked how old I am, I usually have to pause and think before I respond. My gut-instinct is to tell them that I'm 26, but after catching myself I manage to get it right most of the time. And with my birthday coming up in less than 2 weeks, it's going to be a whole process of coping BECAUSE OMG I'LL BE 29.

Maybe it wouldn't be such a blow if I hadn't started feeling old. Things are sagging. I can't hear for shit. My eyesight is going down the crapper. My body aches in ways that make a tube of anti-inflammation ointment sound like an aphrodisiac. 

In other words, I'm a sexy, sexy almost middle-aged lady. Bring it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wendy, you are a hoot!! You just think 29 is old, it just gets better and better. Keep up the good work with your blogs. We all enjoy them!!