i found my long lost happy place. i think i’d be lying if i said everything was always pansies and lollipops for me lately. in reality, it’s been like trying to navigate your way through a city you have never been to, but there’s the promise of amazing things on the other side of town.
tonight i found my map.
it happened in the kitchen while making a pizza for johnny and i. extra herbs in the dough, topped with double the meat for him, double the fresh tomato and whole gloves of garlic for me.
jonas was running in and out between the kitchen and the guest room where johnny was (and still is) working on a paper for school. between the “ready set GO!” and trying to put on his daddy’s jacket, jonas paused to listen to the music.
streaming from my phone’s pandora mumford & son’s station was jack buckley’s “hallelujah” (which is the lullaby i sing to jonas), the beatles’ “blackbird”, iz’s “somewhere over the rainbow” and so many other songs that make everything seem right.
he’d listen for a few seconds, get the rhythm going by nodding his head and soon his whole body started bouncing around as he danced, yelling “GUITAR” and making strumming motions across his belly.
and that’s when i realized that my map had fallen out of the overly stuffed glove box and i had arrived.
it feels so good to be back.