again, y’all remember the whole “i moved the entire house by myself because i may or may not be slightly on the crazy side” thing from saturday?
you know, when i thought i was on one of those trading spaces shows, but only, on my episode….i was the only one there? and did it all? and then became really really sore and tired and OH MY GOD, IS THIS WHAT SWEAT IS?
so yeah, half of the time while i was working….jonas was awake. which meant that john really, truly helped my sanity by watching him for me so that i could trudge along my little, misguided little way. i mean, they cuddled. they played. they had a cookie! and they had a bottle! life was great!
and suddenly, i just was downright jealous of the cooing and the giggles and the “JONAS! SAY DADADADADA. SAY IT. DADADADA. QUIT LAUGHING AT ME! SAAAAAAAY IT!!” because dang it, they were bonding and having fun and who doesn’t lurve baby giggles?
so i snuck back into the living room after shimming down the hallway, past the twin size mattress and over the metal bedframe, over the rolled up area rug and around the stroller to see my boys. MY BOYS. my boys who love me and think that i’m just the most wonderfully amazing person on earth.
which, incase you were wondering….is completely true. i’m awesome. duh.
john was chilling out on the loveseat, and jonas was scaling the futon…and may or may not have been trying to pilfer through my laundry. so i sat on the futon, and jonas smiled and laughed and i think he might have even winked at me, because dude, i’m awesome when i JUST HAD TO PICK HIM UP. it was like i didn’t even know what i was dong, my arms just lifted, my body grunted, and BOOM! he was in my lap.
not 3.4 seconds after arriving in my lap did jonas look at me, open his mouth, and start to projectile vomit. and people, i’m not talking about “OMG! my baby spit up! ew!”. because while that’s gross, nothing is GROSSER (besides copious amounts of poo) than adult-sized vomit coming out of a sweet little baby vessel.
and so i sat there, looking at john, one hand full of vomit, the entire right side of my body covered, holding a baby (who incidentally didn’t have a drop of it on him) asking john to help me.
and you know what he did? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID?
he sat there. and stared. as if to welcome jonas into the man club. his eyes were filled with a mixture of wonder, love, and admiration.
that was a puke to be proud of.
and then he toweled off my leg.