yesterday marked the first day where it was just jonas and i against the world. john went to work at 1:30 and wouldn't get home until atleast 10pm...so i knew that it was going to be a challenge.
what i didn't expect that jonas would physically be awake from 3pm to 1am. yes, you read that right...THREE in the afternoon until ONE in the morning. that's a hella long time for a baby to be awake, let alone be slightly fussy during the day as well.
i take that back. he really wasn't fussy at all...he just wanted to be near me. so while i made dinner he was popped into the sling. he really only got mad right after john came home, and at that point i really think that jonas was just exhausted and really hot (oh, did i mention that our a/c decided to stop working yesterday? i didn't? oh, yeah. that was fun.) even though we camped out the main part of the evening in our bedroom next to the fan.
around 11:30 or so, jonas started to get REALLY, REALLY fussy, and john (out of frustration) made some sort of comment (i can't even remember what) and that set ME off, making me frustrated. so i decided that for the sanity of all three of us that jonas and i just needed to sleep in the guest room where he could cry if he needed to, sleep if he needed to, be held if he needed to...you get the point.
so he finally fell asleep around 1am, i didn't sleep until around 3. he slept until almost 5am, then was hungry/needed a change. it was then where i taught myself how to nurse laying down (jasmine, you're right. it changed my world.), and he went back down quickly. just before 7 he woke up again with a dirty diaper/hunger, so we went back to our bedroom and john changed his diaper. jonas passed out, but john was up, so he took him to the living room and would only bring him in to me when jonas was hungry.
i woke up this morning feeling so absolutely accomplished. yes, i had a fussy baby. yes, i got frustrated because for the love of god i just wanted to grab my mug of tea from the other room. but i did it. all alone. for about 16 hours.
i've never felt more confident in myself.