Monday, February 2, 2009

can't we all just get along?

seriously. i'm just about tired of moms (and moms-to-be) tearing down their peers about their methods, beliefs, etc.

what i'm trying to say is what works for you may not work for me. and what works for me may not work for you.

here's just a few for you to chew on:

i know a beautiful woman who has given birth to four equally beautiful children. she had her babies at home with no drugs, and it was an incredible experience. but i know that i need the pain medication, the endless ice chips, and people wearing white coats around me for me to have MY incredible experience. neither of us did childbirth the only correct way. just what was best for us.

i know that there are doctors who are very strict, who require your pregnancy weight gain to fall on the weight gain schedule just like so. and for some people, that's the perfect doctor for them. frankly, i'm glad that my doctor (atleast with me) isn't a strict guy, tells me just don't drink hair dye or smoke, and that i'm doing a great job doing what i'm doing.

i know that some women just don't get sore. their bodies don't hurt, and if they do, all they have to do is stretch a little bit and their good to go. and that's lucky AND amazing for them that it works for them. but for me, my back or sides will hurt because i'm trying to find a good way to sleep, or because i sit at a desk for 9 hours a day, and frankly, i could stretch all i want, but it's all in vain. that's unlucky for me, but i can deal.

i know that some women have must have perfect pregnancies where they're never uncomfortable, never have a bad moment, and if they do, they decide not to share them. and that's perfectly fine because that's what makes them comfortable. but when someone asks me how i'm doing, or if i have a horribly embarrassing pregnant moment (like forgetting that nebraska was a state or puking up red velvet cake in the middle of a parking lot), then i'm going to share them. and that's what makes me comfortable.

i know that there are some women who will never experience a food craving or aversion. and for that, i applaud you and am amazed. but for me, i couldn't STAND to be in the same room as red meat for the first trimester, and my body needed certain things--and told me that through cravings. a chocolate milkshake from mcdonalds is a nice treat to help my heartburn when i can't drink another glass of milk to save my life. and i have heartburn because i'm stubborn and refuse to stop eating tomato products and vinegarettes.

i know that there are some women who believe that once their child is born, that is it--their life/occupation is to be a mother. i think that's incredible for those who get to experience being a stay at home mom, and found their calling. for me, my family needs my paycheck, and i come from a long line of women who just had to work outside of the home. and that's okay, because that's what i have to do.

seriously, mothers of the world...why can't we just accept each other?


Jaye T. said...

I totally understand what you're saying / feeling. Remember, not matter what others are the mother & you know what's best for you & Jonas. We definitely need to get together soon so we can share stories & cry together if need be. :) Let me know what days / nights you have open & hopefully we can find a time that works! I had my last "normal" dr's appointment today & have the glucose testing next appointment which I'm not thrilled about & then I start going twice a month!!! Help, my due date is going to be here before I know it!!!

wendy said...

jaye t., i'm following you. i have my glucose in two weeks, and then start the going every two weeks after that, too!

and for sure--i'm free just about any night!

Jaye T. said...

I'm free next Tuesday / Thursday nights after work. :)