Thursday, July 31, 2008

pissed.

I seem to have completely pissed my body off. Last night I didn't sleep. Not one freaking minute. I spent it throwing up, other stomach yucks, watching march of the penguins 1.5 times, and working out. I read half a book (a BIG book...I read 236 pages of it),drove around the neighborhood to see if it was safe enough to ride my bike at 245am (and deemed that a negative), and stared at the back of johns head until it was time for him to FINALLY wake up at 430am. Let me tell you...I have never been that excited for 430am in my life, because then I atleast had someone to talk to besides myself.

So far I've been asked twice if I'm pregnant (that's a huge negative).

I finally fell asleep about 630am, slept on and off until 1030 or so, and then went grocery shopping because I'm starting a new me. What I like to call the 'best version of me'.

My goals in this include, but aren't limited to the following:

-major weight loss. I've gone back and forth about how much I want to lose, what size/weight I felt the healthiest all around at, and have determined a number. Its a HUGE number (somewhere around 40 pounds).
-be more secure.
-have a positive attitude whenever possible, but don't shut out feelings that aren't super positive.
-exercise. Lots.

If I become focused on these things, I know without certain I can obtain them. I've done it before, I can do it again.

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